Easter Chaos

Another Easter has come and gone, and I'm relieved to say my family is still intact. How was your holiday?
My parents sold the house I grew up in when I was 19, and moved into a 3-bedroom apartment a couple of miles away. It's not small by any means, but when you add me, my husband, my brothers, their better halves, a barking Miniature Schnauzzer, and my 6-year-old nephew and 17-month-old niece... ah, it's amazing how the living room magically seems to shrink.
Did I mention it's chaotic?
My nephew is wrestling with his Uncle Greg, my sis-in-law is yelling at them to stop, my niece is chasing the dog and grabbing at my parents' fireplace tools, my mother is hollering at my father to put down his cigarette and come carve the ham, and nobody can figure out my parents' new microwave.

Whenever I go see my parents, they have a new technology need for me to rememdy. My dad did something -- not sure what -- to kill the computer, and they asked me for help, but I declared it a lost cause. My oldest brother came in and saved the day on that one. Scott and I got them a DVD player for Christmas, and they said they couldn't see the remote, so they went out and bought a remote the size of a cookie sheet. If my mother can't see those numbers, she has something else wrong with her besides a cataract. FYI, they still haven't rented or watched a DVD. My parents rode the technology train right up to cassette tapes and VHS, but that's where they jumped off.

My family is not particularly religious. I'm the weirdo Christian, after all.
When my mother suggested we "say a blessing" before the meal, my father raised fork and declared, "THANK GOD IT'S TIME TO EAT!" And when my brother announced that the computer was fixed, without thinking, I automatically said, "It is risen!"

You remember when "The Osbournes" were on MTV? Yeah, they always seemed really normal to me.

Happy Easter, everybody.